Chapter One: The past

Cold sweat scampers and trembles along my neck,
taunting my peace,
leaving my thoughts in a utter wreck.
Destiny and dreams are a man’s desires.
But like all things that dwell,
it must depart and expire.
Hope dies a slow, sedated death of individual degrees.
It is like a green astounding leaf without its mother tree.
The leaf shrivels and pleads for its source of survival.
Only finds a man’s shoe to be its murderer
before knowing its rival.
My aspiration is similar to these forgotten leaves.
My soul claimed for what was to be mine,
fool to the word: thieves.
They stole my rights to untroubled memories and my youth.
My eyes suddenly opened to see the blinding ugly truth.
The sight of hideous crimes and the soreness of morality.
Worst they robbed my soul and I was no longer able to face reality.

Chapter One: Through the looking glass

In the thick pitch-black habit of defective mates,

muted lights appear like brilliant sunrays.

So we all settle like the cheating wealth at court.

Bitter, saturated stones press onto my nerves

and that fictitious heat ignites my nape

Like cocaine-rubbed gums, the mouth is stoic.

It becomes effortless to believe your deception

And you fancy my soul for your hunger

My dirt-cheap soul to procure

in exchange for that short lived sensation of

desperately desired devotion,

even if it is barely for an instant.

Chapter One: Change

Gradually, I felt my self conscious slip back in my life without permission.
I once banished it from the mappings of my head when I decided that life was too short to think twice.
I wanted to give in to desires and become gluttonous with the sweet fruits of being alive.
Now, this way of thinking is vanishing and a more human side is seeping through.
Humans are restricted with emotions, responsibility, and second thoughts and I felt this is a flaw.
Now coming to realize, this flaw is whimsically perfect.
The flaw allows for challenge, insight, and change.
Therefore, I will subject myself to change but only if it leads to my end goal.
It is what I wish for every time I blow away a fallen eyelash, flickering birthday candles, and fragile dandelions.
What I believe is the root of all human actions: Happiness.
So this is the beginning of my expedition and struggle to come to the realization of both inner peace and eternal bliss.